When I went to the cinema the other day (to see The Gentlemen – see my review here) I signed up to one of those online cinema club things. It meant that I got a cheaper ticket. But now they also send me emails – which can be a little bit annoying.

This email I received today, I thought was quite funny. After advertising a few upcoming movies they had an advert saying this:

A WHOLE CINEMA JUST FOR YOU.
OFFER EXTENDED UNTIL 14th AUGUST.

Plus 19 friends that is. For a limited time only, you can book your own cinema for just $500*, with our special private booking package, which includes:
• A private cinema for up to 20 people.

Who are they kidding?

It made me laugh. Why pay $500? Just turn up and watch a film. Any film. And the chances are that you will have the whole theatre to yourself. I did!
Thanks to this coronavirus thing scaring the shit out of people, NOBODY is going to the cinema. But hurry. This won’t last. Before too long some people might just wake up and smell the coffee. i.e. Realise that all this coronavirus stuff is one big hoax.

I bet there’s a great film in all this though in the near future. For any film-maker brave enough to make it…