Job Done You A-holes…

Just as predicted yesterday folks. The skywriting of “WASH HANDS” in the Sydney sky had the desired/undesired (you decide!) effect. This morning in Coles supermarket the following sign was on display, where they used to stock hand sanitiser. That leaves me with only one thing to say to the authorities who thought that was a good idea: “Mission accomplished you f*#&ing morons”.

Other Supermarket News…

Also noticeable is the continuing lack of toilet paper (rolls). Yet mysteriously right next to the empty shelves are all these boxes of tissue paper (for ’tissue’ read ‘toilet’ if you like). Can someone please explain why these are not being ripped off the shelves? If the toilet roll section was replenished they wouldn’t last five seconds.

This proves beyond any shadow of doubt that people who panic buy toilet rolls are idiots. As if we didn’t already know. Yes, you morons, you can wipe your arse with these too.

Skywriting Enquiry…

I was wandering how much it costs to get a skywriter up there in his/her little plane. How much do they charge? Is it per letter or word? My latest idea is to hire one and get them to write something suitably daft or cynical exactly where they had them write ‘wash hands’ yesterday.

I was thinking something along the lines of “TOILET ROLLS HALF PRICE IN COLES”. Or maybe “USE TISSUE PAPER TO WIPE YOUR ARSE”. Better still something directly aimed at the authorities, like “FUCK OFF MORONS”.

Does anyone think I can get this crowd-funded?

Sports News…

Meanwhile back to the unreal world of sport. The National Rugby League (NRL) season has already kicked off. But now they are actually issuing advice to players not to shake hands or hug after a score. Just a good old pat on the back. Who are these idiots kidding? These men will shower together after the game for crying out loud. Then probably go out and socialise for the evening. The NRL also went on to advise against any contact with the fans. Would that be the same fans who are paying your over-inflated wages? You bunch of Wankers!

Over in Melbourne it seems the current F1 champ Lewis Hamilton has echoed my own thoughts on why the F1 Grand Prix is going ahead. He says that the race is only going ahead because, “cash is king”. Well Lewis would know right. He gets over 40 million quid a year out of it. That’s about $80 million Aussie. He is yet to refuse to race this weekend…

On the Political Side…

Enough of the ranting about “sports stars”. Here is something so ridiculous it is actually funny. The Australian government’s response to the stock market slide and (probable) threats of a recession has been to announce a huge spending plan. Basically, printing more money – some $17-18 Million – and throwing it around like confetti at a wedding. The idea apparently, is that people will continue to spend and the economy will not stall. They even have the audacity to call it a “stimulus”. OK some of the plans sound almost reasonable such as business support if times get rough. But one of the plans is to give people on the dole (that’s lazy folk who do not want to work) a handout of $750 each! Some 200,000 of the lazy bastards. The only ones who will do well out of that are the pubs of course, because that is straight where that money is going.

My question is this: How is all that money going to allocated? You can bet your last dollar that some people are going to get very rich (if they aren’t already) as part of this process. Proving yet again that ‘when there is blood on the streets, buy property’. *

And maybe that is what this whole nonsense is all about….Well, partly…

*  One of the Rothschild dynasty once said, “the time to buy is when there is blood in the streets”. He made a fortune in the panic that followed the Battle of Waterloo and the defeat of Napoleon.

BREAKING NEWS… UPDATE

Not long after returning home from the school run I read that the Formula 1 Grand Prix in Melbourne has been cancelled. It was only practice day today, the race being in two days time. And just after I had tweeted Lewis Hamilton to make a brave stand. Haaa. At the same time the government is effectively about to ban sports crowds. Prime Minister Scott Morrison says the government will ban ‘non essential’ public gatherings of more than 500 people from Monday.

Interesting. Why not for this weekend also? And since when could a virus count? The mind boggles and Australia stumbles into an Italian style lock-down. Step, by step, by step…